Thank God we have scientists who are studying stuff like this. Researchers at a Dutch university have proven that men become cognitively impaired when they interact with a woman over the phone or on the Internet. What’s more, men become cognitively impaired if they even think they’re about to interact with a woman over the phone or on the Internet. Suddenly, so much in life has become more clear.

To no one’s surprise, the same findings did not apply to women interacting, or thinking about interacting, with men.