I think it’s kind of sad how tizzied the internet has been since Us Weekly ran a report last week that singer Beyonce Knowles was spotted breastfeeding her newborn in public. Not one but three eyewitnesses came forward to confirm it.
Good grief, people. Can’t a mom (even—gasp—a celebrity mom) breastfeed her kid without setting off a shockwave of commentary?
Here’s what happened: Beyonce was seen breastfeeding Blue Ivy, her seven-week-old daughter, at a restaurant in New York. She is said to have fed her baby at the table, where she was having lunch with her husband, Jay-Z. No one at the restaurant appears to have told Ms. Knowles to put it back in her shirt, which is good. (Many public breastfeeders haven’t been so lucky.) But online, people are slinging their opinions left and right, many in support of Beyonce’s decision and some very much against it.
But here’s the thing: I honestly don’t think Beyonce was trying to be some sort of role model (or martyr) when she decided to feed her kid in public. My guess? (A) Blue Ivy was hungry, and (B) Beyonce was enjoying her meal. A + B = Feeding Blue Ivy at the table. It really isn’t rocket science.
But people are making the gesture out to be some sort of Paradigm-Shifting Sign, that either public breastfeeding has finally hit the mainstream (and look! we have a leader!) or the mores of society as we know it are crumbling around us now that moms evidently feel comfortable feeding their kids for all the world to see.
I think the fact that people care so much either way belies the heart of the problem—that for some reason we feel duty-bound to vociferously weigh in on what should be a completely personal decision. Why can’t we all agree that breastfeeding is a natural, vital part of life, and a mother’s decision to breastfeed in public (or not) is very much her own to make—and leave it at that?
The folks on the anti-public-breastfeeding side of the debate shouldn’t make mothers feel ashamed of breastfeeding in public if said mothers feel perfectly comfortable doing so. And those on the all-for-it side shouldn’t make the ones who prefer to breastfeed privately feel like they’re less liberated or openminded or whatever because they choose to feed their child in less public settings.
Here’s what I propose: Everybody shut up for a minute. Let moms decide for themselves whether they’d like to breastfeed their kids in public or not, without the din of your opinions ringing in their heads.
I’m pretty sure Beyonce doesn’t particularly care what you think. Just let her feed her baby, damn it.
I totally agree. Let the woman feed her baby and everyone keep their opinions to themselves. Maybe they would like a taste of Beyonce’s milk
I totally agree. Some women are not shy at all about feeding their babies in public and so they should feed in public. Some women are more reserved, so let them feed their babies where they want, but don’t require them to sit on a toilet in a bathroom and feed their child. That is so unsanitary. People need to see it as a natural process. It is not dirty or gross. It is a mom taking care of her child. Isn’t that what motherhood is all about? Good for Beyonce.
I disagree. It is not a personal decision when everyone else has to see it. I have been stuck on public transportation many times next to a woman breastfeeding a child, and it makes me uncomfortable. I am not wrong to be uncomfortable, it is how I feel, and I am entitled to it. Laws that regulate certain freedoms, such as noise ordinances, depend upon the fact that your right to exercise that freedom intrudes on someone else’s rights- such as the right to quiet. Likewise, your right to pull out your boob in public, especially somewhere like a restaurant or public transportation, where I can’t really get away from it, is rude and intrusive on other people. I agree it is wrong how inflammatory this topic gets, and I am not trying to shame women about their natural feeding of their baby, but it doesn’t need to be in public. There are plenty of other “natural” things we do as human beings that are behind closed doors. I’m not sure why this is an exception.
No one cares how you feel or what you think Meg.
Meg: You speak of “noise ordinances”, do you have kids? Do you know what kind of noise you would hear if a baby is hungry and doesn’t get fed? Lets talk about NOISE! Nobody told you to look. Not sure what city you live in but in NYC way worse things go on than a woman breastfeeding on public transportation. And woman show their breasts off all the time for sex appeal and that’s not looked down upon.
[...] Beyonce was breastfeeding Blue Ivy Carter in public. There are even opinion pieces like at the Philly Mag rolling out of the media about how silly it is for people to be talking and debating the celebrity [...]
[...] little Blue, has popularized discussions about nursing in public. Many have praised the singer, while others have condemned the idea that she engaged in NIP – the acronym for “nursing in [...]
Meg what is wrong with u seriously ? Would u like to eat in a bathroom u expect a mother to go in a bathroom to feed her child? If a woman decides to exclusively breastfeed than she is giving her baby the best nutrition possible! Im a nutritionist and know what im talking about ! But no matter what a mother decides to do for u to say she shouldnt breastfeed in public is just messed up there is so much more i can want to say to u but i think its too late u are ignorant and disrespectful! And i love to tell u i breastfeed my child anytime she is hungry anywhere i am ! Cuz its a beautiful thing and bond and its the healthiest nutrition i can give to my precious child!
Meg what is wrong with u seriously ? Would u like to eat in a bathroom u expect a mother to go in a bathroom to feed her child? If a woman decides to exclusively breastfeed than she is giving her baby the best nutrition possible! Im a nutritionist and know what im talking about ! But no matter what a mother decides to do for u to say she shouldnt breastfeed in public is just messed up there is so much more i can want to say to u but i think its too late u are ignorant and disrespectful!
Meg what is wrong with u seriously ? Would u like to eat in a bathroom u expect a mother to go in a bathroom to feed her child? If a woman decides to exclusively breastfeed than she is giving her baby the best nutrition possible! Im a nutritionist and know what im talking about ! But no matter what a mother decides to do for u to say she shouldnt breastfeed in public is just messed u r ignorant and disrespectfuk
Meg what is wrong with u seriously ? Would u like to eat in a bathroom u expect a mother to go in a bathroom to feed her child? If a woman decides to exclusively breastfeed than she is giving her baby the best nutrition possible! Im a nutritionist and know what im talking about ! But no matter what a mother decides to do for u to say she shouldnt breastfeed in public is just messed u r ignorant and disrespectful
Amen! God bless the Carters.
I agree. Breastfeeding is the healthiest food you can give your child and I encourage any mother to do it whenever and whereever necessary. I would love just to be able to do it, but considering my medical history I may not be able to so I’m excited to see people who can do it. If I could I would be pissed if I was made to go in a bathroom because somoene else is uncomfortable. The question really is Why am I uncomfortable? You don’t see the breast and the woman is covered. With all the breast and tail that’s shown in the summer time and some of all this other “new” fashion that makes me uncomfortable, but I can’t tell people to change clothes can I. Meg, speaks of someone’s freedom should not infringe on anothers but when you say a mother should not feed in public you are infringing on her and you saying that child should suffer and wait till the mother can go find a quiet place. A baby crying is far more uncomfotable than seeing a woman feed. People get out of other people’s business and treat others as you would want to be treated and this world would be so much better off.
It’s so ridiculous that people always trot out “having her boobs out” when referring to mothers breastfeeding their infants. It just shows their ignorance about breastfeeding. I breastfed both my children often in public places — usually unnoticed. I always wore nursing bras and a shirt that was loose enough so I could reach my breasts from underneath, unclasp the cup flap, and nurse the child. There was no breast exposure. Anyone who unbuttons her blouse in public and fully exposes her cleavage to strangers is an exhibitionist. The mother also can drape a baby blanket (or sweater) over her shoulder covering the baby’s head as well as her breast so that nothing is exposed.