In case you didn’t get the memo, Halloween isn’t about eating Butterfingers and Reese’s Cups until you meet an untimely demise like some sort of castoff from the Charlie and the Chocolate Factory remake. No, no, no, no, no. Now, it’s all about gruesome yard displays and needlessly provocative costume ideas (regardless of whether or not they’re age appropriate). Like this sexy Big Bird costume that’s flying off the shelves. Or this sexy Big Bird costume. Or this one. WHY ARE THERE SO MANY VERSIONS OF THE SEXY BIG BIRD COSTUME?! Shouldn’t there be some sort of panel or board of directors that can come to unilateral agreement on the design features so that we’ve only got a single manifestation of a “sexy,” over-sized, anthropomorphized avian character meant to teach children basic life skills? You can thank your presidential candidates for this crap. Is it election day yet?