Dear Monica, What are realistic resolution ideas can you offer for us single ladies to break bad dating patterns and find the one in 2013? —J.N., Chestnut Hill
We’re just about ready to look at 2012 in the rearview mirror and we should embrace the idea that there is no looking back. In 2013 it is time to do things way differently. Here are some relationship resolutions for next year:
- Don’t pursue a guy who is clearly not interested. Get the hint and move on quickly.
- Do not bow down to family pressure and commit to someone who your heart is not into. You are the one going on the honeymoon, not them.
- Definitely accept second and third dates. First dates should not be the measure of a person’s potential. Give a date more than one chance before drawing conclusions.
- Offer to pay on the first date. It shows class and confidence. Assuming the man will always will pick up the tab is archaic thinking.
- Don’t sleep with someone new right away. Have something to build up to and know more clearly whom you are getting involved with.
- Do not say I love you three weeks after you start dating. Wait until you know that you actually mean it and want a serious relationship with this person.
- Remember that it is okay to start a new relationship once the last one is over. There is no set time frame that you need to abide by. Take advantage of opportunity as it comes your way.
- Be open to accepting dates that you might have snubbed in the past. Broaden your horizons to new ways of meeting people. Try a new social organization or athletic club. Break out of the comfort zone of your routines.
- Don’t be too quick to assume a new person in your life is the one by telling your mother, sister, best friend and anyone within earshot. There is something to be said for keep things close to your vest until you are more settled in the relationship.
- Don’t settle for anything less that you deserve! This decision is hopefully a once in a lifetime choice so you want to get it right.
We all realize that promises, even to ourselves, are occasionally broken. The trick is to be honest with yourself and demonstrate self-respect. Feel free to cut yourself some slack when you mess up. It is okay to stand up, brush off your wounds and get back on course. Have fun and know that the right person is out there looking for you as hard as you are for them.