Chris Christie Says He Didn’t Embrace Obama, He Just Walked and Chewed Gum at the Same Time

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie addressed the press in LBI on Wednesday. In addition to winter storm Athena (read: the Nor'easter that's about to kick the East Coast while it's down), Christie offered his thoughts on the presidential election and, specifically, his role in the Mitt Romney campaign. The guv says that he put a lot of effort into getting Romney elected, but that he doesn't intend to dwell on the outcome of the election. Oh, and then he basically offered in 2016 nomination acceptance speech. My work with President Obama was symbolic of the leadership I brought to Trenton...

Mayor Nutter Says Won’t Leave Philly for President Obama’s Administration

Philadelphia Mayor Michael Nutter addressed the press on Wednesday afternoon regarding the 2012 election. He said that, despite some speculation, he has no expectation of being offered a position within President Barack Obama's new administration. He says that he's not going anywhere. The Mayor also added that he thinks a lot of people are happy that Barack Obama was re-elected, pointing out that Philly carried one of the largest margin of victories for the President.

Celeb Scoop: Bradley Cooper Narrates an Anit-Mitt Romney Documentary

Plus: Tina Fey jokes about doing Playboy, Beyoncé is full of puns, the inevitable Chris Brown and Rihanna duet, and more of today’s celebrity news.

Bradley Cooper Gets His Morgan Freeman On. Jenkintown's golden boy lent his voice to the folks producing an anti-Mitt Romney documentary. Cooper narrates Hindsight, which looks into the policies and actions of the failed presidential candidate. [Just Jared] Tina Fey Jokes About Playboy. As 30 Rock wraps up, the local native jokes that she's never going to have another TV show or write another book. She says she's just going to do some Playboy on the way out and then... "gonesies." [Huffington Post] Beyoncé Is Full of Puns. The singer tweeted a picture of a notebook that read, "TAKE THAT MITCHES." [Politico] Rihanna...

Charles Barkley Says Ugly Women Have No Chance to Work on TV

Charles Barkley recently spoke with the folks at SI.com to discuss what it's like to be cursed out by Michael Jordan and what to expect from the 2012-2013 NBA season. Sir Charles says to expect the Lakers or Thunder to come out of the West and the Heat or Celtics to come out of the East. Oh, and he says that ugly women don't have a chance to work as sideline reporters. So, there's that. [SI.com]

Judge Says Pennsylvania Must Allow Full View of Prisoner Execution

A federal judge has ruled in favor of the Philadelphia Inquirer and the Harrisburg Patriot-News, barring state officials from using curtains or other methods to prevent full view of the execution of a prisoner on Thursday. Hubert Michael—a 56-year-old man who pleaded guilty to the 1993 murder of a teenage girl in York—is scheduled to be the first person executed in Pennsylvania in 13 years. A spokeswoman for the Department of Corrections says that officials are still deciding whether or not they'll appeal the ruling. [Philly.com]

Life Is Tough for Philadelphia’s Republicans

It wasn't much of a surprise to most people when news networks all over the country projected that President Barack Obama had won Pennsylvania's 20 electoral votes in the 2012 election. Pennsylvania has gone blue in each of the past six presidential elections and that's thanks, in large part, to voters in Philadelphia. The thing is, though, that not every voter in Philadelphia punches the Democratic ticket. In a post published on Esquire's political blog, City Paper's Isaiah Thompson writes about what Election Day was like for one Philadelphia Republican. As he stood next to a Romney sign he'd planted —...

Brace Yourselves for the Snowy Wrath of Winter Storm Athena

It's November 7, 2012, which means that the End of Days is rapidly approaching. In an effort to streamline communication between now and the inevitable apocalypse, the Weather Channel has decided to begin naming winter storms. Just a week after Hurricane Sandy a.k.a. Frankenstorm a.k.a. Ol' Dirty Bastard a.k.a. Snor'eastercane hit the East Coast right in the mouth, the folks at the Weather Channel urge you to brace yourselves for the snowy wrath of winter storm Athena. Realistically, the winter storm headed our way is expected to bring in a mix of rain and snow that might accumulate up to three...

Thief Arrested With Flat-Screen TV and Frozen Pizza During Hurricane Sandy

Police say that a 29-year-old man ran away when he was spotted by an officer in LBI on October 28th, right as Hurricane Sandy was about to hit. When authorities caught the man, they say he was carrying a stolen flat-screen TV and a frozen pizza. He's being held on $12,000 bail in Ocean County Jail after being charged with receiving stolen property, criminal mischief and resisting arrest. It should be noted that if his frozen pizza was anything but Ellio's, then the guy is a total amateur. [NBC Philadelphia]

Voter Turnout Shows That Basically Nobody Voted This Year

If you made the trek down to the polls yesterday, then go ahead and pat yourself on the back because nobody else voted. Actually, at least 118,000,000 people voted in the 2012 presidential election, but that number is significantly lower than turnout in 2008 and, in some states, the turnout was actually lower than it was in '04. And that's when people were choosing between a Giant Douche and a Turd Sandwich. In most states, the numbers are shaping up to be even lower than in 2004, said Curtis Gans, director of American University's Center for the Study of...