An Adult Gamer Will Now Try to Convince You He’s Mainstream

Grown-ups hog the Xbox.

I am 37 years old. I do not live with my parents. I have health insurance, a master’s degree and only occasionally eat cereal for dinner. And I am a gamer. That last statement shouldn’t feel like such a bold thing to say these days, but for some reason it seems like admitting I own Star Wars bed sheets (which I don’t) or wear Spider-Man pajamas (not that I’d know but they aren’t sold in adult sizes anyway so why are you even wondering?). When I was a kid, video games were mostly played by my peers. You didn’t see many guys with fully cultivated facial hair in line for Dragon’s Lair at the local arcade, or grown-ups gathered around an Atari 2600 at a house party. It was incomprehensible to imagine video games rivaling Hollywood in terms of cultural impact or profits.

10 Worst Things About Being a Philly Sports Fan Right Now

Embrace the suffering.

This week in sports has left me in a bad way. It’s not really a funk I’m in—more like a slow-boiling rage. The young, exciting Flyers got bounced by the relentless (and boring) Devils. The Phillies look like they get a salary bonus for blowing games—the more excruciating the loss, the bigger the payday. The Sixers provided some relief, but only after laying an egg on Tuesday and nearly blowing a double-digit lead last night. This list could read like a George R.R. Martin novel, but here are just a few of the things that are driving me insane as a Philly fan right now.

Congrats Nats, We Have Contempt for You

Also, you can’t have your park back.

Memo to Andrew Feffer (COO, Washington Nationals): On behalf of Phillies fans everywhere, I’d like to congratulate you on the “Take Back Our Park” campaign you launched in an effort to rid your home turf of Halladay jerseys, Phanatic hats and audible applause this weekend. Sports rivalries in Philadelphia traditionally involve cities with a rich athletic history, like Boston and New York, interstate foes from Pittsburgh, or the stinkin’ Dallas Cowboys. The animosity we feel is borne from decades of hard-fought contests. Your efforts mark the first time we’ve seen a team—one that’s eight years old and has yet to reach the playoffs—actually beg us to despise it. So far, you’re off to a great start.

What Has NBC 10′s John Clark Done for You Lately?

Local TV news sports coverage is on life support.

On Wednesday, the Phillies finished their 10-game road trip with a .500 record after roughing up the Arizona Diamondbacks 7-2. Cole Hamels dominated through eight innings and helped his cause at the plate with a two-run single. The game’s wildest moment came in the second, when Carlos Ruiz tried to score from first on a wild pitch and was tagged out by Arizona’s third baseman. Placido Polanco went 3-3 with two walks, and Hunter Pence batted .400. A fan was thwarted while trying to climb the wall in right field, perhaps to take a dip in the Chase Field swimming pool. The game ended at 6:21 p.m. EST. I didn’t watch it, but I knew all of this minutes later, thanks to the radio, websites, a fantasy baseball stat-tracker and Twitter (and I don’t even have a smartphone).

Buying the Inquirer Could Be George Norcross’s Greatest Coup

A look at the power broker’s history with journalists.

Much has been written about the new owners of the Philadelphia Media Network, a merry band of rich white guys who now control the Philadelphia Inquirer, Daily News and Philly.com. Many of those stories have questioned—rightfully—how a group with so much wide-reaching power can run a news operation without influencing its coverage. And no member of Interstate General Media is more controversial than George Norcross. He’s one of the IGM's managing partners, but he’s best known as the Democratic power broker and kingmaker who arguably has done more to shape South Jersey than most elected officials. It’s hard to believe that he won’t impact the way his many friends, business interests and political agendas in the region are scrutinized in his newspapers. But there’s something about Norcross’s past that troubles me, and should concern everyone at 400 North Broad: his complicated relationship with the press.

Not Every Center City Restaurant Should Offer Outdoor Dining

Enjoyment may vary depending on sidewalk.

Each year around this time, I can count on a few signs that spring has arrived in Philadelphia. I can’t walk five feet in Rittenhouse Square without tripping over a sunbather, a toddler running amok, or a circle of young hippies playing hacky sack. My allergies remind me of my fragile mortality as I try not to gouge my itchy eyes out of my skull. And every restaurant in town with two feet of curb space creates an “alfresco dining section." I love the sunshine as much as anybody, but the outdoor eating trend in Center City has reached a comical state of absurdity.

Ironic Philadelphians Should Pay “Hipster Tax”

E-Lanes are just the beginning.

This weekend marks the end of one of Philadelphia’s most bold social experiments, a seminal moment in local history that ranks with the signing of the Constitution, the first union of processed cheese and steak strips on a roll, and the birth of Kevin Bacon. The E-Lane along the 1400 block of JFK Boulevard is an American first: the only stretch of sidewalk designated exclusively for morons who enjoy walking while looking down to text or play Angry Birds. What began as an April Fool’s gag by everyone’s favorite comedian-in-chief, Michael Nutter, has been hailed as a “trailblazing breakthrough” (by his office).

Archbishop Chaput Will Have None of Your Lukewarm Catholicism

Also, he prefers you remember that "gay" means "joyful."

In a recent story about Tuesday’s release of Archbishop Charles Chaput’s e-book, A Heart on Fire: Catholic Witness and the Next America, the Philadelphia Inquirer called it an “e-lamentation.” It’s really a challenge to today’s Catholics who, Chaput says, share the blame for the moral and spiritual weakness of our country. “We … helped shape it with our eagerness to fit in,” Chaput writes, “our distractions and overconfidence, and our own lukewarm faith.” And while Philadelphia’s top priest never mentions any candidates by name, he makes reference to the importance of this election year. Chaput isn’t just calling out his congregation; he’s issuing a political and societal call to arms. Consider his choice of quote from Father John Courtney Murray, a Jesuit theologian who wrote this in 1940: “In view of the fact that American culture is built on the negation of all that Christianity stands for, it would seem that our first step toward the construction of a Christian culture should be the destruction of the existing one. In the presence of Frankenstein, one does not reach for baptismal water, but for a bludgeon.”

Hit-and-Run of Ballerina Should Be Wake-Up Call for City’s Pedestrians

Walk at your own risk.

In the dark hours of Sunday morning, Polina Kadiyska did something that’s become increasingly dangerous in Philadelphia—she tried to cross the street. The stunning 22-year-old ballerina from the prestigious Rock School for Dance Education might have seen the Audi A4 bearing down on her at Broad and Ellsworth and figured it would stop. Maybe she didn’t see it at all, since the driver, 19-year-old Deandre Barnes, was drunk and blew through a red light, according to police. Not long after being rushed to a nearby hospital, Kadiyska was taken off life support.