You know the feeling. You’re standing in some crowded store scanning the racks and racking your brain for the perfect gift for someone on your list. The clock ticking, the crowds heaving, your whole body sweating in a store that’s 89 degrees and playing "Jingle Bell Rock" on a loop, you start to suffer from a certain holiday-specific delusion that alters all your original intentions and  makes everything in the place look like an amazing idea. (“I know he said he wanted a sweater, but oh my God, he’s going to looooove this hat that looks like a fox’s head.”) Now the question as to whether the retailers do this on purpose—that is, create an environment that allows them prey on your weak holiday moments in order to move products you would never otherwise buy— is beside the point. The point, everyone, is that there are just some things, no matter what the shopping conditions may be, that you should never, under any circumstances, purchase as a Christmas gift for anyone you care about. Or for anyone, really. Here, a list of those things you should avoid this season.

It's the most wonderful time of the year! Truly, it is. The city feels festive with shiny snowflakes hanging from lightposts. Happy shoppers bustle around LOVE Park's Christmas Village. Block after block of South Philly is aglow in twinkle lights. Yukon Cornelius and the rest of the Rudolph gang have been on TV at least three times since Thanksgiving. Even the crankiest-looking people storming down Center City streets seem to have a little more pep in their step. What's not to like about Christmas? Well, quite a bit actually. Somehow, it seems like in the past few years Christmas has been on crack. Trends and traditions that should never have stuck are popping up all over the place. Here, eight things about Christmas I'd like to see disappear.